The meaning of life in death
by CelestialElegy
Summary: Casualty of society part2 Sakura survived her attempt at fate, now she must deal with the threat of herself once more as she tries to fulfill her heart. Is she grateful to gaara and what will she do now that she is alive? suicide,death,murder,revenge,dark
1. Restentment

_Ok this is the second part to Crimson Covered Slits. I wasn't going to write this but I am so you better be fuckin thankful. I have other stories to type and I stopped them to write this one. You have no clue how I do this, I imagine the reaction of a real person this is all my imagination none of this is researched as one of the fans asked, I am not a cutter, to much blood will make me faint, I do have a friend who was one but she never told me anything. I am not for cutting but those who do it have hard lives and I admire the guts they have to actually cut into their skin. I do not in anyway incourage such an act. I also don't own any of the characters, and I think fanfiction should make a public disclamier cuz I always forget to do it. And this name is weird and if you have a better one I beg you please do tell me. I have had a hard time with this and well it was this or The meaning of death. i was going to call it Ending Redemtion, which is ending healing i think but that sounded gay so enough with me lets get on with the story shall we._

_Summery; Casulty of Society part 2. Sakura survived her chance at death thanks to the help of Gaara, but is Sakura as thankful as you would think? Completely the opposite. She now has to put up with the burden he made for her. Will she just deal with it? Or try to escape life once more? _

**CCS: part two:The meaning of life**

**Resentment

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**

_resent v.t. to consider as an injury or affront; to take ill; to be angry at. -ment n. deep sense of affront; indignation.

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_

Sakura sat there in the hospital bed gazing out the window. Her dull green eyes followed the clouds as they passed by her. Life was passing her by, leaving her behind once more. The news was out in the village of what she did, her friends had come to her say that she was stupid for trying that, that is was a selfish thing to do. She guessed Gaara didn't repeat everything she had said.

People would look at her when they came to change the water or bed sheets, but they would look at her with shame. Everyone tried so hard to make her feel bad but she didn't feel guilty about what she had tried to do. Naruto and Sasuke couldn't look her in the eyes. Tsunade her teacher had said that is was a momentary lapse in judgment and Sakura had just felt pity and was irrational.

Sakura knew what she was doing and she knew she would again, nothing could stop her from her thirst for death. Kakashi had told her that Gaara had stopped by to se if she lived of not but he never stopped in to see her.

Sakura sat there quietly in her thoughts when someone walked in the room. He stood before her just looking at her and made no move to say anything, nor did she her eyes trained on the sky beyond the walls of her prison ward.

"Don't be so stiff and say something. If not then leave I don't need pity or sympathy." Her scratchy voice said.

"You got it wrong that's not why I'm here."

"Then speak already."

"I just came to see how your mental state is coming. Your perverted sensei told me you asked about me."

"Yes I wanted to see where you hid after you brought me here. Sabaku no Gaara." She snapped to look him in the eyes sternly. "Even though I'm the one who is here I pity you the most. I resent you Gaara of the desert. I will never forgive you for this; I will never forgive you for making me stay in this world. You should have let me die like I wanted. You shouldn't have tried to be the hero; it's not in your personality to save someone. After killing all those innocent people who only wanted to live you save one who wished to die? You are insane, and every bit the monster they call you, demon or no demon you are a monster to me."

"Such words from such a frail little girl."

"I'm under house arrest because of this. Because of you my life has become a hell, the very place you will be. I swear Gaara I will get my revenge on you for this, make you live with the fact that not killing someone was your down fall." She sneered out her emerald eyes flickered with flames of anger.

"I'm not afraid of some women, Haruno."

"No but if I attack you, you can't kill me." She grinned triumphantly at him. "That would be granting my wish, both of them. You would be blamed with my death and I will be dead with no resentment or guilt."

"You little…"

"Kazekage, we need to ask you to leave, Tsunade has come to check up on Sakura-san." Nodding Gaara walked off but not before glaring one more time at the pink haired kunoichi who just grinned back. "thank you."

The nurse left the room and the Hokage entered not long after.

"Well Sakura I see you are well rested." She smiled.

"Hn." Was the girl's response as she resumed looking out the window.

"Well I have good news; you are allowed to leave the hospital."

"About time, I'm not injured I shouldn't be here, there are others who need more help then me."

Tsunade smiled to herself, Sakura was still a sweet young girl who cared about others. Tsunade was surprised when she got word of Sakura's actions, this was so out of character. Sakura was a gentle person who was caring and happy. This had to be a joke. After racing to the hospital she found Sakura in the extreme care ward. Thing started to worry about her when the young ninja's sensei came up and told her what Gaara had told him.

It was true, Sakura wished to end her life. They would protect her from herself no matter what. Sasuke and Naruto were to blame it seemed. Everyone had started to ignore her and leave her out. Even she herself had tried to protect the young girl by not giving her missions and such. But no one ment for this to happen.

"But Sakura you cannot go home, you are going to be placed under one of your teammates care." The older women said.

"Who?"

"Kakashi is your teacher so he is out of the question and he has missions to see to. Naruto, well I'm sure you don't want to live with him anyway. That leaves…"

"Uchiha." She stated coldly.

Sakura looked up at the big house before her. The Hokage stood behind her following her gaze.

"Lets go Sakura I informed Sasuke you would be here earlier but you delayed. Move along." Giving a slight push Sakura moved forward. "Don't be shy Sakura. I mean you get to stay with Sasuke, and he has to stay and take care of you. Aren't you happy?"

"Why would I be happy that he has to watch me? I don't care for him like that anymore Tsunade. I haven't for a long time and I faked most of it so nobody would notice the sudden change in emotion. The only reason I'm telling you this is because I know you made Gaara tell you all I said word for word." Sakura stared coldly at the manor before her.

"come on Sakura, cheer up would you. Don't be so down."

"Oh I'm sorry but everyone around me glaring at me like I did something horribly wrong does not put me in a happy mood. And it is no ones business but mine and who I wish to tell, I am not dead yet and until I am it is my personal affairs on what I do and my reasons. They can't make me feel guilty for what I tried, only guilty that I didn't succeed in it."

Her sensei was slightly stunned at her tone of voice. She just moved on walked, falling in steps behind Sakura.

A few moments after Sakura knocked (it's a lie she pounded on the door) on the door Sasuke opened it looking down at Sakura.

"You're late."

"I kno…"

"Well I hate you to can we get this over with I'm tired of listening to you people." Sakura growled out. As Sasuke opened his mouth she beat him to the punch. "Uchiha, listen and listen well I am in no mood at the moment to fake put up with your smart ass remarks. I tried to take my own life think about whose or what else I might do. Judge your actions wisely, I'm not afraid of you anymore." She pushed him out of the way and entered the house. Walking upstairs Sasuke and the Hokage followed her. Passing all others doors she walked to a white one 4 doors down.

"That's Itachi's room." Sasuke growled at the thought of his brother.

Sakura looked back with an evil grin. "I know." She slammed the door shut after entering.

Sasuke turned back to the blond Hokage. "Who does she know where his room is?"

Weeks began to pass and all the while Sakura stayed at the Uchiha manor. She barely left the room she chose to stay in and just ignored Sasuke.

One day during the week Sakura walked into the bathroom to take a shower. Starting the water she got ready. A few minutes later Sasuke walked but the room and heard no noise from within, thinking Sakura had left he opened the door and walked in.

Moving to the tube he pulled back the curtain and looked down into the tub.

"SAKURA." He screamed pulling his pink haired teammate out of the water. Her heartbeat was slow but she was still alive. "Shit Sakura." Hitting her back action took up her body and she choked on the water spiting it up and out.

Groaning at the pain in her back Sakura pushed up and sat on the floor and looked at the youngest Uchiha waiting for him to start yelling at her. And sure enough he didn't let her down.

"What the hell is wrong with you? This is the 3rd time this week Sakura. If you do anything like this again I'm telling the Hokage."

"That's what you said last time Uchiha. Suck it up already and do it. At least I won't have to see you anymore. Would you stop saving me? Don't you get it you moron? I HATE YOU. THIS IS YOUR ENTIRE FAULT." She growled out. "Stop being an idiot and let me be. I don't want you near me. Why do you think I keep ignoring you?"

"That's not what you used to say. The old Sakura would never have…"

"Well you killed the old Sakura when you left her at the gate. This all started because of you. Remember that Sasuke, when I die it will be your fault." Pushing him away from her she moved and left the bathroom to leave Sasuke in his thoughts, and stare at her in all her naked glory well she went.

This was the final straw; Sasuke had come upon her again trying to take her life, this time a kunai wrenched in her gut. Sasuke rushed her to the hospital once more for her rehabilitation. AnBu stood outside her doors not long after he exited.

_Sorry for the big jumps in time but there are things I need to hit in this chapter. This story does end and this is a dark fic. Meaning NO HAPPY ENDING, or is there? oO. we may never know……jk. i know.  
_


	2. Rectified

The meaning of life in death

Rectify  
_( rek ' – ta – fi) v.t. to set right; to correct; to purify; to convert and alternating current of electricity into a direct current; rectifiable a. rectification n. rectifier n. _

"Well you killed the old Sakura when you left her at the gate. This all started because of you. Remember that Sasuke, when I die it will be your fault." Pushing him away from her she moved and left the bathroom to leave Sasuke in his thoughts, and stare at her in all her naked glory well she went.

This was the final straw; Sasuke had come upon her again trying to take her life, this time a kunai wrenched in her gut. Sasuke rushed her to the hospital once more for her rehabilitation. AnBu stood outside her doors not long after he exited.

* * *

Guard and security had been upped and Sakura was placed in lock down. All weapons were removed from her body and all sharp objects from her surroundings. Having her under 24-hour watch she was also placed in rehab. Slowly she seemed to get better, pulling out of her darkness. She started to get closer to her friends again talking and hanging out with them. Naruto was his same old self but he was still weighing heavy with everything that happened. Sasuke was the same cold person, but it seemed he was more careful about what he said around the unstable girl.

Sakura was still quiet and she didn't really talk that much, her bright spirit had yet to return. She was always gloomy and such, not becoming of a young lady.

The villagers would whisper their disapproval of her actions but that did nothing to aid her in her recovery. Her time out in the village was limited after an attempt on someone's life. Not that you should feel bad for him, he told Sakura she should be locked away and that a ninja of her caliber shouldn't go so low, and that maybe she should have died, she was a menace to the village and an insult to its name. The news had spread across all ninja that the Hokage's pupil had attempted in the taking of her life.

Not even that fazed her. It was Naruto that had jumped the boy but it was she who was blamed, and because she nether admitted or denied the accusation she was placed under heavier security. (Nobody listens to Naruto (he tried to say it was him))

Sakura sat in the forest surrounded by all her friends. The day was nice out but the scent rain was on the air. She smiled with them as they laughed at Naruto.

"I'm going to kill you teme." Naruto called out as he jumped Sasuke barreling them to the ground.

"You idiot."

"Oh Naruto-kun be careful." Hinata freaked out over Naruto's fight with the once missing nin.

"Don't get blood on me." Sakura added. "I don't have much that they will let me wear." she complained.

"Oh Sakura don't worry, k. Tsunade-sama is just worried about you."

"What's there to worry about Hinata? I'm obviously not going anywhere and it's not like anyone will trust me enough to leave me by myself or let me do something without watch. And there is everyone trying to make me feel bad for what I did, like it's my fault that I hate myself when everyone around me caused these feelings and were so caught up with themselves to even notice me there. Tsunade thinks I will think about my actions and feel bad for them; that I will regret it when all I have to do is lie and I'm free." She muttered to herself.

Hinata caught most of it but she didn't understand all of it.

"Sakura-chan there is nothing we wouldn't do to help you."

"Then tell me the truth, I what total honesty. What do you think about what I did? And what is the real reason you all make a point to stay around me and see me?"

"No Sakura, we want to be with you."

"Yeah. What Hinata said." Ino agreed.

"Hokage-sama threatened us, so did Naruto." Neji said from her left side. "She thinks it will make you feel like everyone cares about you."

"Thank you Neji for telling me the truth. It seems you are the only one who will not lie. All anyone cares about is the Hokage. They treat me like glass about to break, that if they aren't careful I'll shatter to millions of pieces. I do not want sympathy." She grounded out.

"Oh Sakura don't listen to Neji-san he doesn't know anything."

"Maybe everyone is right. I shouldn't have done that. I was just trying to escape the world around me. I was being weak and taking the cheep way out. But…forget it. I'm sorry to inconvenience you all. It is going to rain and I should leave just like the rest of you. Sasuke if you don't mind I wish to be alone away from people. I need to sort out my thoughts and figure out what to do next. Gomen na, I'll see you back at the manor later tonight." With that she pumped chakra into her legs and jetted off into the surrounding trees.

"Damn it. You moron now look what you did. She wasn't suppose to be on her own." Sasuke swore hitting Naruto over the head and into the ground.

"What did I do? You're the one who was told to watch her."

"You fuckin' distracted me Idiot." Swearing to himself Sasuke ran into the forest to chase after the pink hair kunoichi.

Farther away from them Sakura landed on a cliff overlooking the vast acres that ran on for miles on end.

'Nothing is quiet as it seems now. Nothing is as good as it was before. Being a kid is easy but now things have changed.'

Sakura watched as the dark clouds rolled in with the pounding promise of a storm. She smiled grimly up at the sky. "Run little bunnies fear the rage that surrounds you, and fall pity to those you believe will save you." She laughed lightly. "Rage storm, show no mercy to those who have been condemned."

Slowly rained down, the calm before the storm. But soon she stood there before the storm just waiting.

Sasuke looked for her but could not find her. The storm had started and it was rain harshly to the ground. He had begun to lose his balance and decided to head back and inform the Hokage of what had happened. AnBu should be out searching for her soon after.

Rain fell to the ground below as the gods thundered down from the skies. The earth below their feet shook with the anger of the gods and titans. Many people would back down in her spot but she never backed down from a challenge like this. She would brave anything to get to her dreams, to fulfill her deepest and sacred fantasies. What would be so much as to make her brave the worst storm of the century? Well that was something only she knew.

In her own world of darkness and shadows she found a reason to justify her actions and it is this reason that keeps her going. She had things going on in her head that even the brightest minds of the world could ever figure out. But she could, that was what made her the perfect weapon. She could calculate the projectory of any item and determine what others could only with math and equations well with her it was all the thought of mind, and the simple problems of everyday life.

Things weren't always this way; she was a love sick child once but matured past that stage years ago. That was the first change she ever made. She has never had that gentle sweet and kind look in her eyes again all this time. Nothing affects her any longer, the threat of death doesn't scare her and nothing else matters enough to provide reason to fear.

As emotionless as a stone, but just as hot on a summer day.

She has abandoned who she was for who she now is. But now it is time to pull back the old mask out of the closet.

A/N: Ok' there it is. I had to fix a lot of it and it didn'd mean what I wanted it to but that is ok got the same point across. Well review if you like it. If I fon't get at least 15 reviews i may stop the story. I know may people like the original. And if you don't review you grow closer to losing the story. I have other things to do so I don't have to do this.


	3. the possible end

Alright this goes for every story I am writing. All of my stories are going to be stopped. I am going to stop typing them. I have other things to do and I do not need to worry about my stories. I have PSAT soon and I have to get my grades up. I will update Sketchbook every now and then but that is because I want to finish it and I have so many ideas to use. Below are the reason and announement on each story.

In My sight / may be updated. I am at a stupid point where is does not match my original plan.

The Sketchbook / Story will be updated when ever, and you should be lucky at all. My time has been taken up by other things.

The meaning of life in death / This story is the continued part of Casualty of Society (aka Crimson Covered Slits). It doesn't seem to be as popular as its original and I am sorry to all of those who do love it. I will update when ever I get into a dark mood otherwise note this as being Canceled. And I had it all planed out to, all I needed to do was type it up.

There are other things I have been doing and other things I need to do. I am also writing other stories that are not typed up. I may type them sooner or later. For now everything is on hold if you want me to continue please tell me that and why. If you don't I'm afriad the story may be stopped for good. For now its only temp.


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